What are you resisting?

I am in my second month of this year’s Temple of Light, my online six month group journey. Holding this group allows me free rein to show the very deepest way that I work with people, and it is a really special place for me. But boy, have I resisted it, and other steps out of my comfort zone, along the way!

I am eternally fascinated by how I, and the people I help to support, can grow and evolve. And what I now know to be true is that sometimes, the place of my most surprising and delightful growth is on the other side of discomfort, sometimes extreme discomfort. I don’t mean that I put myself in danger, or do things that are rash or obviously unpleasant. It usually goes more like this:

I am presented with something that is ‘not me’. It seems quite interesting/exciting/appealing but it’s just ‘not me’.

In 2021, my spiritual mentor published some oracle cards through Hay House. I had already worked with Sophie for over a year and trusted her so very deeply. After my many years of learning and training, Sophie stood out as a teacher with utmost integrity. But still, I balked at the idea of oracle cards. I felt that it was a step too far; that it was taking me down a road that I wasn’t sure I wanted to walk. I would be aligning myself with a group that I wasn’t sure I wanted to align with. I felt that I would need to leave behind the part of me that still gets so much pleasure out of working on the sciencey/anatomy/muscles and bones aspect of my clients. I couldn’t see how those parts of me could coexist. But they can. They do.

What was happening was that I was confusing ‘me’ with all the conditioning and the projected assumptions that I have absorbed over the years of being alive. The assumptions that were shown in clear relief when I was faced with the discomfort of the oracle cards. The Ego, in its role, keeping me safe from change/ridicule/embarrassment despite the gentle push of my Soul to keep growing.

I bought the cards, and began to use them for myself and in my work with clients and they have been a fascinating tool to expand my way of connecting to energy. But, in a way, it wasn’t about the cards at all. It was simply about saying ‘Yes’ to my growing willingness to follow my curiosity, to feel the intuition and then ACT. It’s almost through doing that, I was giving a signal to the universe that I am listening and responding. And then, the growth happens, I am braver and on it goes..

Of course, it’s not about flinging ourselves towards every interesting proposition that comes our way or grasping for answers. Discernment is important. But can you see that ‘thing’ that you resist or shy away from as having a beautiful potential in your life, being an unfolding towards something new and fresh before the closing-down, safety and protetction feeling kicks in? Before the Ego speaks and says ‘I couldn’t do it because…’

Without pressure on yourself, can you notice things like this that may be coming towards you, that you push away, because it’s ‘not you’. Could you be wise and compassionate in your questioning and ask 'What is it about this that I don’t like/doesn’t fit’ instead of dismissing it entirely? Can you dissolve some of the assumptions about who you are to allow inspirations for who you can become?